The Golden Toga Flap: This summer’s pregnant women

Two brief prologues:

  1. I’m still accepting submissions for the upcoming Harry Potter Appreciation Fiesta — fanfics, fanart, butterbeer recipes, critical essays, and more! You can find the full details here.
  2. The Golden Toga Flap celebrates people and/or organizations being amazing. For more info about it, click here.

For those of you currently enjoying cooler climes, it’s been a scoche warm here in the U.S. lately.


Being a relatively recent transplant to hot weather (this will be my seventh summer in a warm climate), I’ve developed some tricks of dealing with it, including the following:

  • Sleeping with gallon Ziploc bags of ice on my feet
  • Working with a sandwich bag of ice tied to my head
  • Hanging damp towels in front of open windows
  • Attaching damp paper towels or rags to the front of a fan
  • Snuggling up to a hot water bottle filled with ice water (note: this is much easier if you can make long, skinny ice cubes that fit through the bottle’s neck, like with this tray)
  • Periodically spritzing my face and legs with water
  • Keeping my secret stash of Snickers bars in a bucket of ice water in a spare dryer

I should probably mention at this point that I spent the hottest summer in state history doing laundry at a youth camp five days a week. In an uninsulated shed with no A/C. With four dryers running all day. For an average of 11.5 hours per day.

Yeah. Good times.

Approximately where I worked.

Approximately where I worked.

This week’s Golden Toga Flap award goes to people who are not just navigating this heat, but are also navigating it while pregnant. Seriously, you ladies amaze me. Let’s start with the pregnancy thing. You’re growing a human being … inside your own body. You’re totally responsible for his or her (or their) nutrients and stimuli. And soon enough, through a process I’d rather not think about, you’re going to wind up with this tiny human being as his or her own separate entity, and you get to provide his or her nutrients and stimuli for another decade or so, 24/7/365.25, with love and patience and foresight, even when the tiny human throws tantrums and says s/he hates you and threatens to run away with someone s/he met on Tinder.

Holy moley. I can barely keep my Christmas cactus alive.

And to top it off, in preparation for this small human, your body doesn’t just serve up some fun side effects like morning sickness, fatigue, mood swings, itchy skin, and edema. No, at the present time, you get to experience these symptoms in all their glory during weather that’s felling everything from professional golfers to carriage horses.

It’s official: Y’all are superheroes. Hats off to you, ladies, and good luck for the weeks ahead. May your fluids be plentiful and your support teams supportive. We applaud you for bringing new life into the world, and we stand amazed at your dedication to the great cause of parenting.

To all of you, pregnant or not: How’s the weather in your area? What heat-beating tricks do you have up your sleeve?


Photo credits: Temperature map from The Weather Channel; fire from LoggaWiggler on Pixabay.


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